More on Being
As I looked at the title I gave this post, my mind immediately read it as “Moron Being”. Hah! It WILL call me names. I almost changed the title, but realized it would entertain me more the way it was! 😉 I’ll discuss those charming little mind games we play on ourselves in a little while.
My last post was on the qualities I wish to embrace as I go forth into my week. It’s important to choose the qualities one wants, I believe. I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about being “crabby”, or “impatient” or “anti-social”. I seem to be able to embody those quite well without conscious intervention 😀 If I’d rather replace those, or at least diminish their prominence, I’ve found that making lists such as I discussed, does wonders.
These words are the result of my thinking about a great comment on the previous post, made by ellaella. I responded to her that I hadn’t thought about the interconnectedness of the qualities of “being” I mentioned there. Once I did think, it came out rather longer than I would have predicted. So thank you, ella, for encouraging yet another post! I owe you a coffee and chocolate. 🙂 A disclaimer: Neither ella, nor anyone else should take this as me “lecturing” them. I only ever lecture myself. (And there are times I sure wish I’d stop!) 😉 But ella HAS stimulated further reflection on my part, the results of which are spewed out upon this post.
Being>Having>and Doing are all points on the triangularity of how we experience life. The “being” one is just that—being. It’s challenging to not think of all the things “to do” once we have our being list in place. In fact, I think it’s a good exercise just to let those go. I’ve even said to myself “You will “do” NOTHING this week!” 😉 (Of course, that’s impossible.) There really are no goals associated with this being-ness exercise. I’m just acknowledging qualities I already have, because we all do. I pick and choose the ones I like; that I feel I want to exhibit more in my life. Until ella asked, I didn’t think about the inter-connectivity amongst them. So here are my thoughts about that now.
What I do think is that if I were a person with all the qualities I listed, you would begin to recognize me by those qualities. Each of us would have our own unique lists. As the weeks go by—and I’m going to experiment with this—I believe that the more I declare my preferred mental states, and refine my lists each week, the more I’ll step into the kind of person I really want to be (and on some level always was). We get so distracted with the daily minutiae of our lives that we often forget “who we are”. A quality ella and I share is a desire to be “rested”. All I do with that one is sit quietly for a few moments, and say to my self: “Ah… rested.” “Rested” is a nice, restful sort of word, isn’t it? 😉 If I don’t, at that moment, feel quite rested, then I can speculate (perfectly OK!) “Wouldn’t it be nice to be rested? Wouldn’t it feel great to embrace the day knowing I’ve had all the sleep I need?”
Now, my mind will chime in with things like: “OK, so I have to start going to bed at 8:30, and stop drinking coffee, and stop having stress, and win the lottery so I can quit my job which is causing stress, and remove certain personality characteristics from my partner…” 😉 Well. We can each make our own mind-lists, too. And the mind is very good at it, and will tell you everything that’s wrong with you, and what you need to do about it—completely uninvited. When that happens to me, and it does, like, a hundred times a day; if I remember to, I’ll say: “Funny little mind, you! Playing your games. Thank you for wanting to keep me safe, and busy, and feeling useful. Now go away for a while, and I’ll take it from here.” A “mind game”, naturally! 😛 But it seems to work.
What I most emphatically will NOT do at the end of this week is ask myself: “OK, on a scale of 1 – 10, how rested (peaceful; musical; helpful) were you?” The answer, even if there were one, doesn’t matter at all. All that does matter is that I seek the qualities that give value and meaning to who I am in the world. There are some forms of Buddhist and Vedic meditation which teach us to hold certain qualities in thought, such as “beauty” or “truth” or “compassion”. These lists that I make are my way of personalizing such practices to fit my own joy. 😀