Over and Over again
I think it’s a good thing that words of wisdom from my favorite spiritual teachers roll around in my head. It can get a little irritating at times, as when I can’t get “that song” out of my head, but these are phrases and advice I’ve chosen to think are important and useful. Here are a few of them:
“Don’t take it personally”. –Don Miguel Ruiz
At first, I balked at this one. After all, how can I not take virtually everything personally, as it is ME who is experiencing the feedback of my world. However, if I turn this around, just a bit, I get “You don’t have to take it personally”. Many have said that opinions about one, voiced by others, are really about them. Those opinions have nothing to do with us at all, other than giving us opportunities to look at the patterns we have in place.
I have a friend, who, when she first sees me coming, asks me how I am. So far, so good. I generally answer “Good”; “Splendid”; “Very Well”; or some such thing. Again, so far, so good. But then, she’ll sometimes say “Really?, you don’t look that great!” Arrrrrh. It took me a long time to work on that one. She’s told me that she’s just concerned about me. She “reads” me, she says, and my “energy” doesn’t always match what I’m saying. This may or may not be true, but it brings me to my next phrase:
“What You Think of Me is None of My Business” –Terry Cole Whittaker
This is actually the title of one of Dr. Wittaker’s many books, and gets my vote for the best book title ever. It plays right into my friend’s comments. Whatever her concern is, whether she is right, that I’m “lying” about how I feel, it’s still none of her business, unless I invite her comments by telling her I want to talk about the conditions in my life. It just doesn’t feel like an appropriate or helpful greeting to be told I don’t look so good! Also, whatever way I’m feeling, I’m making a serious attempt at feeling better by affirming I am well–in fact I’m always doing this.
“Talking about your problems; arguing for them, keeps you in them”. –Abraham, by way of Esther Hicks
So, I talk about how I want to feel. When I think of it, why would I not always want to talk about how I want to feel? If I do, I will actually start to align with those feelings more often than not. As I write this, I’m seeing that I’m still a bit sensitive and defensive about my friend’s remarks. Believe me, I’ve done a great deal of work on this issue in my life, including many sessions with my favorite energy therapy (see “Health” topic), and even telling my friend I don’t want to hear this from her.
“You create your own reality”. –Seth, through Jane Roberts
Well, if that’s true–and the more I investigate this, the more I believe it–then I have allowed myself to be open to my friend as teacher, and my resolution of these issues in my being, as part of my reality. And the learning is powerful, and useful.
“There is no “there” out there. –Fred Alan Wolf
This, from a quantum physicist, postulates that not only can a physics experiment change when observed (the “observer effect”), but that there is actually nothing “out there”, outside of our own perceptions. Literally, you, reading this, do not exist, if I am not here to blog this at you! Wow, I’m pretty powerful! But, then, nothing you experience “really” exists outside yourself, either, from this perspective.
“The basis of your life is freedom, the purpose of your life is joy” –Abraham, again
This can be hard to take sometimes, particularly if we’re observing the world around us. But all the other teachings listed here remind me that I am free to observe what I will, and take what action I will. I can always take action that moves me closer to joy, and in so doing, raise the joy-factor around me a little. That’s the best, purest, most helpful action I can take. And it’s important not to act (so far as that is easy and doable) until I’m in a place of well-being. I can work for any cause I wish to from that viewpoint.
So, recently, the aforementioned friend gave me this comment: “You look great! Really grounded and strong! Way to go!” OK, so far, so good? While we all like to receive compliments, and I think it’s much more uplifting to say pleasant things than unpleasant ones to people, I still remembered that “what she thought of me was none of my business.” I really was able to just let that comment wash over me, without attachment.
“Good to see you too!”, I said.